Showing posts with label single mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label single mom. Show all posts

Thursday, September 15, 2011

A Circular Life: Back to School with the YA Indie Carnival

My biggest back-to-school moment came at the age of 27.
Not what you would typically have in mind for such a moment, but there it is.
I hadn't been in school since I withdrew from classes in 2000. At that time I was married and we were expecting our first son. Images of being some kind of modern day wonder woman, juggling classes, work and baby, filled my brain...which must have been stuffed with cotton. Because really. I was not that woman. Not at that point. Unfortunately, the pregnancy started showing danger signs. The doctor, who was a bit of a cotton head himself, said I needed to quit either work or school because both was too much on my body. Well, school doesn't pay the bills so I withdrew from classes.
In 2005 it became obvious that I would need to return to school in order to provide a better life for myself and my sons. Their father had walked out earlier in the year. I was pregnant with our third son.
Ironically I was right back in the position I had withdrawn from in 2000, except this time I was plus three children and minus one husband. In January I signed up for a few classes at the local community college, just enough to qualify for aid and not go crazy with the transition back to school.
It was probably one of the hardest things I'd ever done.
At the time social anxiety and depression had me in their grips. I sat outside in my car, crying in terror at the idea of going into a classroom, but it had to be done. For the boys it had to be done. My sons, who were 5 1/2, 3, and 3 months were at home with Grandma. My mother, who also quit college to take care of a baby, was working at WalMart. I had worked at WalMart. I knew it wouldn't be enough to give the boys the life I wanted them to have. It was the only thing that propelled me through those doors that day.
It took awhile for me to calm down and realize no one gave one hoot about me being there. It took even longer for me to realize that I had a lot to contribute to the classes I was in. But slowly, month after month, I grew in strength and confidence and became that wonder woman juggling job and school and babies.
It took a lot of help from my family and church but together we made it through. I think the struggles of learning to coordinate a life with so many components trained me for being a producer/director in the video realm. When I moved on to a four-year university, I showed a strong natural skill for getting groups of people to work together to achieve a common goal.
Also, I should point out, three years after their dad left, the fiance I walked out on (teenage girls can do stupid things) in high school came back into my life. We got married in 2008. Both of us finished up our degrees and we're trying to keep our sanity while raising these boys and working at our dream jobs.


For More Back to School Stories at The YA Indie Carnival Check out:
http://www.refractedlightreviews.com
http://pattilarsen.blogspot.com
http://courtneycolewrites.wordpress.com
http://nicoleawilliams.blogspot.com
http://fisheramelie.com/blog/
http://laurasmagicday.wordpress.com
http://amyjonesyaff.blogspot.com
http://rachelcoles.wordpress.com/
http://thewarriorseries.blogspot.com
http://pjhoover.blogspot.com
http://www.aliciamccalla.com
http://heathercashman.com/better_off_read
http://www.abbiglines.com
http://cherischmidt.blogspot.com
http://www.lexusluke.com
http://www.suzyturner.com/
http://kasi-kcblake.blogspot.com/
http://kimberlykinrade.com
http://jlbryanbooks.blogspot.com/

Friday, February 5, 2010

The Plot Thickens

I have some serious weaknesses as a writer.
Detail is not my thing. I don't know architecture or furniture. Maybe that will come through in the rewrite. For the moment, all I'm interested in is getting the basic story out. It still hasn't completely revealed itself. But tonight, despite my struggling with the details, I hit another pocket and found myself swept up into the story even as it flowed through my fingers.
Granted, I cannot claim it on my taxes, but I am a writer. I always have been. But it takes so much self confidence and willingness to make a lot of sacrifices and to be a complete failure...I became too practical. That was the problem. As a single mother I didn't have time to waste on fantasies of being published and being successful. I needed a solid plan. Problem has been, none of those plans has ever been completely me. Since I wrote my first poem in kindergarten, I have been a writer. Maybe not a great one, yet, but regardless, I can spin a yarn.
But anyway, tonight has been great despite the obvious layer of crappy writing. That's why it's not about being a writer, but a re-writer.
I'm suddenly very anxious to find out what happened to Katherine all those years ago.
Novel pages complete: 45! 11, 806 words.
It's quite a breakthrough.